Fleabag Play Script [2021] 〈POPULAR 2024〉

I put it in a shoebox. I wrote “sorry” on the lid in eyeliner. Then I put the shoebox in the freezer. Because I didn’t know what else to do. You can’t just… bin a guinea pig. They’re too furry. Too present . Even when they’re not.

If she were here, she’d tell me to stop talking to the audience. She’d say it’s “theatrically indulgent” and “borderline unhinged.” And she’d be right. She was always right. That’s why I loved her. That’s why I… fleabag play script

This piece captures the play’s essential loneliness, its scab-picking humor, and the raw address to the audience as both confessor and voyeur. I put it in a shoebox

That look. I know that look. It’s the “oh, you’re still doing this” look. My dad has that look. He wears it like a cravat. Because I didn’t know what else to do

That’s the thing about death, isn’t it? It’s the admin. The voicemail you have to delete. The jumper you can’t throw away because it still smells of their neck. The freezer full of frozen rodents you’re too much of a coward to bury.

I miss my best friend. I know you’re supposed to say that quietly, into a pillow, with a glass of white wine and a Joni Mitchell record. But I’m saying it here. To you. With red wine and no record. Because the needle’s broken. Because I broke it. Because I break things. Not on purpose. That’s the worst part. I break them with love.

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