How To Clear Blocked Downpipes !!install!! -
Arthur bought Gladys a bottle of whisky. He cleaned his mother-in-law’s knitting needle. And he learned the true moral of the story: Don’t push the problem down. Clear it from the bottom. And if all else fails, find an old lady who knows where the real blockage is.
Arthur remembered a YouTube video. "Use a garden hose," the man with too many teeth had said. "Ram it up there." Arthur rammed. He turned the tap to full. For ten glorious seconds, nothing happened. Then the pipe shuddered, made a noise like a bear giving birth, and a geyser of black, leaf-infused water shot out of the top of the pipe, directly into his face. how to clear blocked downpipes
He straightened the coat hanger and shoved it up the pipe. Scrape. Thud. Something shifted. He pulled it out. On the end was a black, tar-like slug the size of a gerbil. He flicked it into the bucket. It landed with the sound of a wet sponge hitting concrete. Arthur bought Gladys a bottle of whisky
A sound like a champagne cork made of mud. The entire contents of the pipe—two years of roof debris, the tennis ball, and what looked like a fossilised squirrel—shot out of the bottom into Gladys’s waiting bucket. Clear it from the bottom
The downpipe began to sing. A clean, clear glug-glug-glug .
Arthur put on his ear muffs and tapped the downpipe. It sounded solid. Too solid. He removed the top strainer (a rusted metal flower that hadn’t stopped a leaf since 1987). He peered inside. It was not a pipe anymore. It was a time capsule of decay: a sludge-smoothie of moss, roof grit, and one extremely suicidal tennis ball.
"Arthur," she said, "you’ve been pushing the blockage down . It’s now wedged in the bend like a cork in a wine bottle."