To say “Kadhalum Kadanthu Pogum” is to engage in cognitive reframing. It is an act of radical acceptance. It acknowledges that the current state of agony is not a permanent condition but a phase. The phrase forces the sufferer to zoom out of the microscopic present—where every second without the beloved feels like a decade—and see the macroscopic timeline of their life. On that long arc, this chapter, no matter how devastating, will eventually be a page turned.
In the rich lexicon of Tamil cinema and colloquial philosophy, few phrases carry as much quiet weight as “Kadhalum Kadanthu Pogum” (காதலும் கடந்து போகும்). Literally translated, it means “Love, too, shall pass.” On the surface, this seems like a cynical, almost nihilistic dismissal of one of humanity’s most celebrated emotions. But to understand the phrase is to unearth a profound, deeply mature philosophy of resilience, temporal wisdom, and the art of letting go. It is not a denial of love’s power, but an acknowledgment of its temporality. This essay explores the layered meanings of “Kadhalum Kadanthu Pogum,” arguing that it serves not as a eulogy for love, but as a survival mantra, a psychological anchor, and a cultural antidote to the myth of eternal romantic obsession. kadhalum kadanthu pogum
At its core, the phrase echoes the ancient Stoic and Buddhist principle of anicca (impermanence). Everything that begins must end; every feeling that rises will eventually subside. Love, in this context, is not a special exception to the laws of nature. It is a storm—beautiful, terrifying, all-consuming—but a storm nonetheless. Just as a cyclone decimates a coastline and then retreats into the ocean, love enters a life, reshapes its landscape, and eventually, its intensity fades. To say “Kadhalum Kadanthu Pogum” is to engage
This is not to say that love leaves no trace. The phrase does not promise amnesia. Rather, it promises transcendence . The word kadanthu (past tense of kada – to cross, to pass through, to transcend) implies a journey. Love is a bridge one crosses. On the other side of that bridge is not emptiness, but a newer version of oneself—scarred, wiser, but still walking. The phrase whispers to the heartbroken: You are not the first to feel this, nor will you be the last. The pain you mistake for eternity is, in fact, a visitor. The phrase forces the sufferer to zoom out
This phrase is the emotional equivalent of a steady hand. It does not promise a new love. It does not promise happiness. It promises only one thing: continuation . And sometimes, that is enough. Sometimes, the most heroic act is not fighting for love until your last breath, but breathing after love has left the room.
Furthermore, the phrase is a shield against the romanticization of suffering. In many cultures, prolonged pining is mistaken for loyalty. Men and women wear their unhealed wounds as badges of honor. “Kadhalum Kadanthu Pogum” calls this bluff. It suggests that refusing to let go is not strength but a willful imprisonment. True strength lies in acknowledging the pain, honoring the love, and then, crucially, walking on .
This moment resonated so deeply because it stood in stark contrast to the dominant trope of Tamil (and Indian) cinema: the undying, obsessive, eternal love that defines one’s entire existence. From Mouna Ragam to Alaipayuthey , we have been fed the idea that true love is a permanent state of yearning or bliss. Balachander’s character offers a radical counter-narrative: sometimes, love ends. More importantly, you survive.